In the fact of life, conflict occurs frequently at different level of communication, for example, at work, between friends or within families. Also, conflicts with a loved one are in the different situation from negotiating with a stranger. Thus, to learn how to resolve the conflicts becomes more and more important. If the conflict is handled well, it will lead the person involved to be mature and deeper understanding.
I am the person who is quite talkative, but my boyfriend is poor in expression. Although the relationship has been maintain for more than two years, small conflicts still occur frequently between us. For example, a few days before, my boyfriend, my best friend and I had lunch together. I paid my full attention on talking with my friend and totally ignored that my boyfriend has a habit of napping. Unfortunately, he used up his patience to tolerate with the feeling of ignored and strode angrily. At that moment, I was so angry with his rude behavior and felt shy in front of my friend.
However, when I calmed down, the sense of guilt gradually came out and I realized that I need to show my respect not only to the audience, but also the person around me. Because I was also keen on face-saving, sending a text message was the best way for me to tell him my apologies in the tone of honesty. As expected, five minutes later, he replied me and forgave my fault.
At the end of the story, I want to mention that sometimes, conflict is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, a relationship with frequently conflict may be healthier than one with no observable conflict. Because nobody is prefect, the conflicts may help you find out and modify the weakness of your personality.
Therefore, what do you think about the interpersonal conflicts? Do you have the same problem between you and your lovers? Could you find a better solution to resolve the conflicts? Waiting for your sharing... ThanksJ
Hey Ella,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all , I think it's pretty brave of you to post your relationship problems on your blog, especially since it's quite a personal issue, but nontheless I admire your courage and your post has proved that point that relationships aren't always a bed of roses and the example of conflicts between loved ones is most close to heart.
As a third person's point of you, both of you may be at fault. However your boyfriend might be a little too sensitive, and I do think it's rather petty for a guy to get mad just because he is deprived of sleep (or rather nap).
You on the other hand, might have been able to show more sincerity in your apologies. Sometimes it's better to express remorse in words rather than text. Albeit your boyfriend has forgiven you, I think that an apology from you would make him love you more.
I sort of have the same problem as your boyfriend. I tend to be silent when I'm angry, and when my girlfriend ask me what's wrong, I would say nothing is, and she had to endure silence for the rest of the day. I've come to realise how horrible this is for me, because it's like you're shutting someone out from your life. A classic example of communications gone awry.
Anyway, hope you lovebirds enjoyed V day =)
Nicholas Chai
Hi Nicholas,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comments. Problems cannot be hided in heart. We need to shout out every single question you are not sure. That is my opinion. What do you think?